Happy Anniversary

I got a lovely gift this morning but I won't post a picture of it. I just have to keep saying I love my cat, I love my cat, I love my cat. She must have known what day it was. That makes the 2nd gift in as many days. Last night it was a rather large gecko, this morning just in time for breakfast I got a bird and she was VERY animate about bringing it in side. She even gave nasty, mean growls to her brother letting him know that was HER breakfast.

So, will I be able to get home now because of this damn flu thing? Will flights to the USA be cancelled? This is just fucking fabulous!

Today's SparkPeople Day at a Glance calendar note says:
"Grow a garden. Watching plants grow and thrive under your care is a great exerience! Dig in with cheer, knowing you're beating stress, becoming more active, and surrounding your home with beauty."

Nothing much to say

HI Doris!

Spark People Day at a Glance calendar note:
"Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great ones make you feel that you, too, can become great"
So far I've lost 22 pounds with the help, never ending support & motivation, exercise and healthy eating from my Spark People family. 22 lost, 20 to go.

I stitched a bit more on the Teeny Wedding Sampler.

It's all gray, overcast and VERY humid today. Woke up with no a/c, but it only took them an hour to fix it. Hope it doesn't break again soon.

How much longer????

Oh yeah, 30 DAYS!

Have a GREAT weekend Doris!

SparkPeople Day at a Glance Calendar note for Friday:
Move and shake! Be as active as you can each day. Dance to the car radio, fidget at your desk and get up as often as you can. You'll become fitter, healthier and slimmer!

Sat/Sun:
These are the last two days of TV turnoff week. Here's one more reason to keep the tube off: 90%of food commercials aired during Saturday morning shows for kids advertise junk food, according to the American Diabetic Association. Wellll, I didn't even know it was TV turnoff week and I highly doubt my DH would EVER go for such a thing.

I must have done something right in the past couple weeks because I've lost a couple more pounds, WOO HOO. I took a profile picture today and I don't notice any difference in the profile picture I took January except for my chin. I have done a Walk Away The Pounds video every day this past week, even got up to the 3 mile fat burning walk for Abs which is quite a work out and felt good! I did that one twice.
I did join the new May Boot camp work out group, Sweatsuit to Swimsuit Boot Camp. I can't wait to start it.
I got out and walked this morning. One of our outside cats was inside this morning and he let me know he was ready to go back outside after breakfast at 6:30AM so I got up. It was already 83F at 6:30AM!!! But I decided fuck it, I'm walking. So I did a 2 mile 40 minute walk in the humidity. I NEED to do it, I have 15 more pounds to loose!

The mouth feels much better, it only hurt for a couple days.

I stitched more on the Teenie Wedding Sampler. I am ALMOST done with it. (Sorry Kristin, I NEED to finish this before it haunts me in my sleep)

This is the "rivalry" weekend with the red sox, so far the sux won Friday night in extra innings. Saturday's game is actually on tv HERE on Fox Sports starting at 11PM. I'll be in front of the tv with my pillow and blanket and probably a cat.

Ok, well it's time for a hips, abs & thighs workout today! Have a GREAT weekend.

ow, Ow, OW ooooooooooowwwwwwwwwie!

Hi Doris!
Owie some more! I had my second tooth pulled last night and it hurt like a son of a bitch! It's been roughly 18 hours now and it's still swollen. This one hurt worse that the one last week did. I think the tooth last week was dead and had no feeling anyway but this one wasn't completely dead yet. I want to go back to bed.

HEY LURKERS! MY FRIEND KRISTIN FROM CUPPA JOE DESIGNS HAS A CUTE NEW COMPLIMENTARY DESIGN UP ON HER BLOG! YOU GOTTA CHECK THIS ONE OUT!
Sleep is a poor Substitute I have it all kitted up and ready to stitch but I need to at least make some effort on another project.

SparkPeople DAily Calendar note for today:
"Know your "red flag" menu words. Avoid restaurant items described as: battered, bottomless, breaded, buttery, cheesy, country, creamy, cripsy fried, giant, loaded, smothered and stuffed. These are signs of a diet disaster!" Yes, good advice but those foods are so good! HOwever, I can say that I haven't had most those above foods in a loooooooooong time. I WANT to get heathlier, I WANT to live longer, I WANT to loose this fat!

I did stitch last night, woo hoo. I was trying to stay still and calm from getting the tooth pulled so I stitched on the Sweetheart Tree Teeny Wedding Sampler thing for my niece. I stitched the vine down the left side and come to find out, it's fucking OFF! I fucked up somehow and the leaf things(green splotch things) are higher than they should be. Oh well.


Went to the diabetes dr. on Sunday night and he said I am doing fine, just need to keep losing weight. He also lowered my thyroid pills, I had been taking a 75MG does and he lowered it to 50MG (for those of you who know what that means) so I must be doing something right. He didn't seem to be alarmed at my higher than normal moring blood readings. He wants me to have the blood work done again in June and gave me his cell phone number and e-mail address so I can send him my test results. He is a nuce guy.

Have a GREAT day!

38 more days!

Have a GREAT weekend Doris!

SparkPeople Day at a Glance Calendar page for April 16:
Make yourself a priority. Are you always doing for others but neglecting yourself? Your goals are important and you deserve to take time for yourself each day to achieve them. Give yourself the attention and love that you need!
SparkPeople Day at a Glance Calendar page for April 17:
Pace around. When on the phone, for example, get up and get moving around your home or office instead of sitting still. Talk about multitasking!

I have browsed that Online Needlework Show twice now and not found anything that jumped out at me. I guess my desire for Stitching has died or maybe I want to save my money and have my septic system pumped out at home or I want to have money to spoil my kids/grandkids this summer. I'm even thinking of selling off some of my stash.

Yesterday was the Yankees Hope Opener at their new stadium. We turned on the MLB TV thing and watched the pre-game festivities. How great to see BERNIE there along with so many other past great players. Jorge Posada hit the first home run in the new stadium and Johnny Damon had the first base hit. Of course they lost by a horrible score. I hope they have a GREAT season!

DH bought me an aerobics step yesterday, YAY, now I need to find some FREE online step videos to work with. The cats aren't fond of this new toy but Spot likes the treadmill. Spot even did a few minutes of a Walk Away The Pounds video with me on Wednesday.

May 25, yep, May 25 sounds like a good day to fly, too bad I won't have any alcohol to help me have a better flight, but I'm sure there is a bar or 2 in JFK, LOLOL, not to mention YANKEES merchandise.

Update on the Ghost peeps

When I posted the picture of DH's Easter dish with the Halloween Ghost peeps on my SparkPage, a friend left a comment and said "Those aren't Ghost peeps, those are Holy Spirit peeps for Easter" . I laughed, she made my day.

So excited today!

GOOD MORNING DORIS!

WOO HOO! I re-connected with a dear, sweet, long time friend who helped me through my darkest, painful days back in 98-99. I got her phone number and phoned her today and we talked for 45 mintues. It was so nice to talk again and I hope we can get to meet up before I go on vacation next month.


And speaking of vacation, we are going down tonight to talk to the travel agent and make some reservations. Sadly British Airways won't be flying back in until 31 May which is after I plan to be outta here so I'll have to decide what else to fly. So I'm thinking of maybe leaving here on Wednesday the 27th or Thursday the 28th, I would like to be home by Friday the 29th so I can try again to renew my already expired driver's license so I can go new car shopping. WOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOO.


Now and the downside of this morning, DH called from work and wanted to double check my dr. appointments for next week because he MIGHT HAVE TO GO ON A BUSINESS TRIP, GRRRRRRRRRR.


The inside of my arm is a pretty brown & green today from where they took blood on Saturday. My tooth hole is healing I guess, so by the time I go back on Monday to get the other tooth pulled, this one I hope will be healed so I can eat.

Still no stitching.

I did a 2 mile Walk Away The Pounds video then re started it to do another mile walk. I need to get back upstairs and do the strength training, I'm slipping on that. And if my scales are right, I lost another 1.5-2 pounds. I'm not confirming that as a fact yet though.


Today's SparkPeople Day at a Glance Calendar note for today:
Swap whole for white--grains that is. White flour, bread, rice and pasta are highly processed and low in nutrients. Whole grain varieties are packed with nutrients, fiber and filling power.

TTFN

Happy Easter

HI DORIS!

Happy Easter dear readers and lurkers. I hope you all have a wonderful day. I made up this Easter "dish" for DH. Yeah, I know those are Halloween ghost peeps, I forgot to tell DD to get me some Easter ones last year and forgot again this year, so we'll have Ghost peeps again next Easter as well, LOL. I did have a PAAS dye kit on hand though. Notice I said this is DH's EAster plate, that is becuase I have to go to the dentist tonight to get two teeth pulled, one on either side of my lower mouth. How fun! I just hope THIS TIME HE USES ENOUGH NOVICANE TO KEEP MY MOUTH NUMB FOR THE WHOLE PROCEDURE! Geeze, he did give me novicane last week for the gum cleaning thing but not enough to keep my mouth numb for the whole procedure. By the time I got out of the chair, it had worn off completely.

Spark People Daily desk calendar note for the weekend:

You can enjoy a handful (about 25) small jelly beans for 100 calories. Remember that one handful can easily turn into two or three, so enjoy your portion and then keep your hands out of the candy basket. That is easy here, EAster is FORBIDDEN and they wait for at least a week then they put the EXPENSIVE IMPORTED Easter candy out on the store shelves. They do that on purpose.

Haven't stitched since I finished my cute Coffee project

Had 2 MAJOR scares at the diabetes dr. yesterday. First I got the results from my blood tests from last week, the were all good and he was pleased, however, my A1C test (some sort of test that measures glucose levels for the past 3 months) said 11%! Now that puts my blood glucose levels OVER 300 EVERY DAY and at almost death level. I have NOT HAD A GLUCOSE READING OVER 180 in WEEKS! One day it was 191 but that is because I had pasta for dinner. That number reading was so totally off, he looked at my blood glucose monitor and saw my numbers and said the test was so wrong and how could that be! So I had to re do the blood test and the reading was more like 6.9 which he considered good. We both breathed a sigh of relief. He was going to file a HUGE complaint with the lab.

Then there wasn't a thyroid test on the results so he sent me to do that. That is where the second scare came in. Had the blood test, left the lab, my abaya (that black ninja style bathrobe like thing women wear) sleeve was wet and I kept pulling it away from my arm. Pulled up the sleeve to find out why it was wet, my arm was all bloody, the band aid was soaked to overflowing down my arm! That has NEVER happened, so I calmly went back to the lab. I could feel my heart racing and my arm hurt. Mind you, I have a GREAT vein in my left arm, it just sticks out real pretty so there should have been no problem. I am NOT a bleeder either, so the lab nurse cleaned me up, pressed an alcohol pad on my arm then another band aid and it stopped. Now the bend in my arm is purple, green & blue, yeah I know for Easter. That was VERY scary!@ I kept checking it all the way home.

My blood results are Uric acid numbers are down, HDL Cholesterol is down, LDL numbers are down, Total cholesterol is down to low, Liver and Kidney function is fine and Triglyceride is up just a tiny bit. He said he is pleased with the 2 kg weight loss but I still need to lose more. Yep, I know and I'm trying. I exercise in some form every single day and have kept it up, if I don't it's only hurting me and no one else.

Still no summer plane reservations.

The Yankees are 4-2, WOO HOO. They are doing fair, I have tried to watch the games on my MLB TV but it is messed up to where it skips, freezes and the picture quality is beyond horrible, so I watch the games on the Yahoo game channel.

Have a GREAT day.

PLAYYYY BALLLLLLLLLL!!!

Woo Hoo, yee haw, yay yay yay, yahoooo! Baseball season starts today!

GO YANKEES, GO METS!

I have another dentist appt tonight, yuck. More of that roto rooter gum digging thing. Last visit he said he is going to pull my 2 loose teeth and said something about dentures. NO, I DO NOT want dentures and we CAN'T AFFORD IT! Just fix the ones I have left and get it over with.

Thanks Kristin for the comment on the purple dumpster post, I laughed when I read it. That would be kind of hard to get to her, ya think? LOLOLOL.

Todays SparkPeople daily desk note:

"You've got to think about 'big things' while you're doing small things, so that all the small things go in the right direction" - Alvin Toffler

Ok, well I'm off to do my exercises!

Hey V, here's the purple dumpsters

The pics aren't very good since they're from my camera phone and it was close to sunset but here are pics of the purple dumpsters.

Hi

Spread the Spark to others by living as an example. Use positive peer pressure by practicing healthy habits in front of others, and they'll be more likely to do the same! (Why when it's more fun to sit in front of facebook rather than exercise and get healthy?) Personally, I'd rather be doing exercises and burning calories!
I joined a Biggest Looser Challenge on one of my teams but I have to modify the meals and food because of the stupid diabetes and the food available here in hell.

I haven't stitched in a week.

I have 2 abscessed teeth that I am having taken care of tonight, either root canal or extraction, should be exciting!

At the dr.s the on Thursday I weighed 140 (for the 3rd straight week, Yay me!) but morning blood glucose readings are too high to suit her.

The YANKEES WON THEIR FIRST GAME EVER AT THE NEW YANKEE STADIUM! I didn't stay up to watch it on MLB TV on the computer and it was only an exhibition game with the Cubs but they won! I hope to be able to watch the game on MLB TV tonight since it's an afternoon game in NY. 2 more days till Baseball season officially starts, WOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bye

Another cute finish

I finished the new project Sunday night. I love it! It's a freebie from Cuppa Joe Designs called Coffee is a vegetable. I stitched it on 32 count French Vanilla Twist linen from Silkweaver with Needle Necessities and Six Strand Sweets flosses. I added the coffee cup buttons.

Basic Apple BAke

That is what the Spark People Day at a Glance calendar is today!
Basic Apple Bake:
Place 4 cored apples in a baking dish with 1/4 inch water. In the center of each, place 2 TBS brown suat, 1 tsp margaine, and 1/8 tsp cinnamon. Bake at 375F for 35 minutes. Serves 4 224 calories, 4 grams of fat

Hmmmm, the size of the print on this blogger thing is a LOT smaller than my other browser window pages.

Someone stole my bras. All my bras that fit just fine have been replaced with ones that are too big. I guess that is a good thing? I also think I have a waist again, not really sure about that but I think I felt a curve there the other day that I know wasn't there before.

Anyone want some corned beef? I have LOTS left. I swear DH gets a bigger piece of beef every year and he knows I don't have anything big enough to brine it in nor that large pot like we used to have.

I did a 52 minute 2.5 mile walk this morning. It is getting warmer earlier in the morning now making it harder to keep up that walk, but I will keep going as long as I can.

Today's Spark calendar note

Get outside and enjoy the first day of spring! For a fun activity that keeps you in shape, try hiking. Find a park or trail near you and take to the hills to torch calories, build endurance, and strenghten your bones.
I would LOVE to hike the trails back HOME in New Hampshire, sadly they are FULL of ticks, mosquitos, black flies and wild animal shit.

Happy Spring!

The corned beef and cabbage was ok, a lot on the dry side but that is because I cut a lot of the fat off before I put it in the brine water back in February. The home made Irish Soda bread was good though, LOLOL. Now we will have leftovers for the rest of the week.

I kitted up a new project last night and had fun doing it. It was a tough decision on a couple of the floss colors but I will post it when I'm done.

10 Screening Tests Everyone Should Consider

This was on SparkPeople today:

With health care cost rising at an alarming rate, having a list of common screening tests to ask your health care provider about may help keep you on the path of healthy living. While many of these tests are not diagnostic in nature, they do allow your doctor to determine if you are at greater risk for developing certain diseases or ailments.
Some of these tests are age specific, nevertheless, if you have a family history of a specific disease, such as colon cancer, breast cancer, or early onset osteoporosis, it is important to discuss your options with your doctor to determine what is best for you.

1. Fasting Blood Glucose: With type II diabetes on the rise, this test is crucial for determining your risk for developing this disease. This test measures the amount of glucose or sugar in your blood after a minimum 8 hour fast.

2. Lipid Profile: This test measures your total cholesterol, LDL also known as low density lipoprotein (or bad cholesterol), HDL also known as high density lipoprotein (or good cholesterol), and triglycerides done via a blood sample. It is recommended that a baseline test be done when an individual enters their 20's. If results are normal, it is generally recommended that testing be repeated every 5 years or as recommended by your physician.

3. Blood Pressure: Twenty percent of Americans suffer from hypertension, however many of those afflicted with the condition are asymptomatic. In others words they do not present with any outward symptoms. But if you have a history of dizziness, headaches, and/or visual disturbances please do not hesitate to contact your doctor.

4. Pap Smear: Many women often neglect this vital test once past their child bearing years, but it is important to note that cervical cancer can be asymptomatic until the cancer is well advanced.

5. Mammograms: Timing for mammography has been up for debate as to when the initial screening should begin. The American Cancer Society and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists recommend women begin routine mammography at age 40 and a follow-up every 1-2 years after the initial screening. Other organizations such as the American College of Physicians and the American Academy of Family Physicians recommend initial screening at age 50. Talk with your doctor to help determine the best timing for you.

6. Skin Cancer Screening: Skin cancer is the most common form of cancer diagnosed in the United States. Early diagnosis is essential for survival, especially with malignant melanoma. Each May many hospitals around the country hold free skin cancer screenings in conjunction with local dermatologists in support of Skin Cancer Awareness Month.

7. Bone Density Screening: This test commonly referred to as a DEXA scan or Dual X-ray absorptiometry is recommend for all women over the age of 65. However, this test can be done much earlier if a woman has a history of anorexia, rheumatoid arthritis, an early hysterectomy or any other ailment that may increase one’s risk for osteoporosis.

8. Prostate Screening: Just as there is a debate over when mammography testing should begin, same is true regarding prostate screening. The prostate-specific antigen (PSA) and Digital Rectal Exam (DRE) are generally recommended for men between the age of 50 and 75, however, if you or your husband is at high risk, please ask your doctor about earlier testing. I DON'T THINK MY READERS NEED ONE OF THESE, LOL

9. Thyroid Screening: Although thyroid issues are more common in women than men, according to the American Thyroid Association every person over the age of 35 should be screened. Unfortunately, low thyroid levels can cause symptoms of anxiety, depression, fatigue, difficulty sleeping, and weight change which may be misinterpreted as other ailments.

10. Colonoscopy: As mentioned in an earlier blog, colon cancer is the second most fatal form of cancer after lung cancer. Having a baseline colonoscopy at age 50, or sooner if there is a family history, is fundamental to early diagnosis and treatment.

These are just some of the more common screenings your health care provider may recommend, but it is important for you to keep track of your own health and wellness. If you experience any change in your health, it is always best to err on the side of caution and follow up with your health care provider. Being proactive versus reactive may help prevent further issues down the road.

Also it is very important to keep tabs on your vaccine schedule. If you have not had tetanus shot within the last 10 years please let your doctor know. With the rising number of whopping cough cases here in the U.S. your doctor may suggest a pertussis booster along with your tetanus injection.

Calendar note for today

Start a journal. Use it to track your progress, record your successes and learn from your mistakes. When you have a bad day, use it to remember why you chose your goals and how far you've come to date.

I have a journal that I keep track of my weight, measurements and what I eat.

I finished the May part of the oakhaven sal thing yesterday.

Wednesday night I pulled the fabric and some floss to start another project.

Today I am making the St. Paddy's day dinner since the 17th was on a Tuesday and everyone was working. Corned beef, cabbage, carrots and potatoes, Irish Soda Bread. I will portion my meal.

My sinus or allergies are horrible today, sneezing, itchy nose & eyes, watery eyes. All that vacuuming and cleaning yesterday must have stirred up the dust.

Have a great day.

March 18

I should be cleaning the house since I'm making dinner tomorrow for friends so this is just a quick post.

I have totally forgotten to tell you loyal lurkers about my friend Kristin's new endevour. She has joined with another lady to create Cuppa Joe Designs a GREAT new blog about cross stitch,(Kristin please correct me here if I'm wrong) Please pop on over and have a look.

Today's SparkPeople daily desk note says:
Plan something fun. Set aside time to participate in activities you enjoy on a regular basis. Plan a weekend trip, take a drawing class, or schedule a round of golf. Enjoy your life to the fullest! (Incase you were wondering, those are the Spark colors, red, gold, green & blue.)

So far I haven't exercised or walked today. I have been busy cleaning up the house and stitching. I finished the May project from oakhaven designs.

Have a GREAT day!

The reason for tree cutting

This was pretty coincidental that we got a notice today about tree cutting after I asked that office guy yesterday, oh and it is addressed To:All Western Resident
I am typing this just as the notice reads:
"We are sorry to inform you that we have instructions to cut all big trees in the compound according to the committee of "Dengue fever" disease fighting, that according to the committee report, the disease carrier mosquitoes use the big trees as a rest place.

Contractor started the cutting process under direct supervision of (insert name of group DH works for) Engineering department, appreciating your understanding and cooperation. "
(Translation - You, American lady that walks without being covered, the trees WILL BE CUT DOWN, do NOT run out and yell at the men with the chain saws in your shorts and tank top)
So where is the notice that says SLOW THE FUCK DOWN ASSHOLE

Happy St. Patrick's Day! Please have a glass of green beer for me. Are you doing any thing special? On Thursday (our weekend) I will be cooking that hunk of beef that has been sitting in brine in the fridge for a month and having the usual boiled dinner. Today is also my son's girlfriend's birthday. I got her a couple neat things but sadly didn't order them until too late to arrive for her birthday. I know she will love them.

I did do a walk this morning, shaking my head all the way. Haven't done my walk video yet but I will get that in.

Today's Spark calendar entry:
Happy St. Patrick's Day! Research shows that moderate drinking can prevent certain diseases, but binge drinking is never a good idea. If you do imbibe, limit it to 1 drink daily for women and 2 drinks for men.

Breathe, breathe, breathe(WARNING, CONTAINS BAD LANGUAGE)

First off I will be luck if this actually posts. The damn internet is fucked up again today.

The fucking morons are at it again. So today while walking I see more trees being hacked down, the trees lining the inside perimeter wall and trees lining the inside perimeter street proving shade while I'm walking. Finally I see a guy who I know works in the offices here so I stopped him and asked him WHY ARE THEY CUTTING TREES? You you want to know the answer? This is so fucking ridiculous! They are a security risk! EVERY SINGLE TREE ON THE COMPOUND IS A SECURITY RISK! They are chopping every fucking tree down! That ORDER came from the Military secruity officer. Of all the stupid, insane dumb ass things! Then I said they NEED to do SOMETHING RIGHT NOW about the assholes that think they need to drive 55MPH down the road. I said I have almost gotten run over because of these assholes. Want to know his reply to that? "Well we did put up speed limit signs" URRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! I said NO you Need to do something NOW! They already took out most of the speed bumps and cutthe remaining of them in half so the assholes can drive around them. Ok, that's enough, I'm pissed off enough, and YES I KNOW I CAN PACK UP AND GO HOME and that will resolve the problem.

Ok, so I did finish my walk, 4 laps, 52 minutes, about 2 3/4 miles, MOSTLY IN THE FUCKING SUN! Remind me to put on my sunscreen tomorrow.

I GOT SPARKED THIS MORNING! Yep, ya'll will be REALLY sick of me Sparking all over the place, but I love this group! First off, I just joined a new team last week, the Leslie Sansone Walk Off The Pounds team, on Sunday they chose me as walker of the day! Woo Hoo, I haven't been a team member that long either. What a great motivational group! Then I was also chosen as Spark Page of the day on my New Hampshire group. There is a challenge going on to make a Spring-y page so I put lilacs and flowers and added pictures of my Spring cross stitch projects that I did.
Then this morning there was a bag on my chair that our friend brought back for me from the states. I got my Spark daily calendar and my Spark monthly calendar and my Spark people t-shirt which I proudly wore this morning while walking. Now I am really Sparked up! The daily calendar has Spark tips, quotes recipes. It's NEAT! He also brought me some more test strips for my blood monitor, a HUGE thing of real old fashioned oatmeal which we can't find here.

Ok, well it's time to walk with Leslie. I'll leave you with a quote for my day:
"Take a breath. Slow, deep breaths can help conquer stress and lower blood pressure. With your eyes closed, practice inhaling deeply into the belly and exhailing slowly. Tey this several times throughout the day."

The importance of walking

My sister sent me this, I laughed my ass off!

Walking 20 minutes can add to your life.
This enables you at 85 years old
to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
home at $7000 per month.

**************************************************************************************************************************

My grandpa started walking
five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old
and we don't know where he is.
**************************************************************************************************************************
I like long walks,
especially when they are taken
by people who annoy me.

**************************************************************************************************************************

The only reason I would take up walking
is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
**************************************************************************************************************************

I have to walk early in the morning,
before my brain figures out what I'm doing.
**************************************************************************************************************************

I joined a health club last year,
spent about 400 bucks.
Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to go there?
*************************************************************************************

Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
************************************************************************************************************************** I
I do have flabby thighs,
but fortunately my stomach covers them.
**************************************************************************************************************************

The advantage of exercising every day
is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, he looks good doesn't he?'
**************************************************************************************************************************

If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
start with a small country.
**************************************************************************************************************************

I know I got a lot of exercise
the last few years ...
just getting over the hill.

**************************************************************************************************************************

We all get heavier as we get older,
because there's a lot more information
in our heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
**************************************************************************************************************************

AND
Every time I start thinking too much
about how I look, I just find a Happy Hour
and by the time I leave, I look just fine.

You could run this over to your friends,
But it's much easier to just e-mail it to them!