The importance of walking

My sister sent me this, I laughed my ass off!

Walking 20 minutes can add to your life.
This enables you at 85 years old
to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
home at $7000 per month.

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My grandpa started walking
five miles a day when he was 60.
Now he's 97 years old
and we don't know where he is.
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I like long walks,
especially when they are taken
by people who annoy me.

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The only reason I would take up walking
is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
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I have to walk early in the morning,
before my brain figures out what I'm doing.
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I joined a health club last year,
spent about 400 bucks.
Haven't lost a pound.
Apparently you have to go there?
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Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
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I do have flabby thighs,
but fortunately my stomach covers them.
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The advantage of exercising every day
is so when you die, they'll say,
'Well, he looks good doesn't he?'
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If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
start with a small country.
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I know I got a lot of exercise
the last few years ...
just getting over the hill.

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We all get heavier as we get older,
because there's a lot more information
in our heads.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
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AND
Every time I start thinking too much
about how I look, I just find a Happy Hour
and by the time I leave, I look just fine.

You could run this over to your friends,
But it's much easier to just e-mail it to them!